Wednesday, 14 November 2012

Hi ya'll

Well here we are halfway though November, wow the year is almost done.  And today is my little man's birthday, he is the big 2.

I haven't been around much, even though I'm on break I just found I've not had much time.  Its amazing how busy life can keep you.  But on the weight front I'm maintaining, things have been good. I've found a semi-balance point where my weight seems stable and I'm mostly happy.  I say mostly because the last two weeks I've eaten badly, one of the things I hate about this time of year is the abundance of junk.  There are always get togethers, we have conferences or training sessions with too much yummy food, last Friday I was given an award (for being so damn awesome) and of course it involved an abundance of bad food and because it was in my honour the people organising were a little pushy about me going and eating and making sure I had a lot.  I actually left a lot of my plate and felt a bit bad about wasting the food but my hips thanked me, Xmas parties are starting too so that means I need to invoke a bit more self control.

As always its so easy to make excuses as well, last week I had the kids home for the whole week so I didn't get any exercise in, I used them as my excuse as to why I couldn't go to the gym or for a swim.  But really I should have at least gone walking (we did a few short walks but at toddler pace so not much really).  The previous week my sister was in hospital due to an accident and with going up to see her or waiting around for family members to show up I only made it for a couple swims.  I've not been to the gym proper for three weeks now. But this week I was craving it, Sunday we went for a walk with the kids in the back pack which was good and I swam a couple times.  I wanted to go to the gym today but forgot that I had booked in to give blood - DH and I both give blood together its like a weird date LOL

My plan is to work out at least four times a week for the rest of the summer, except over Xmas/NYs when the kids are home.  The other thing I need to commit to is getting back in to healthier snacks and not eating after dinner.  Those back sliding habits will be back-side making habits!

Sunday, 14 October 2012

Pics pics pics

Today some of my students wanted to take a photo with me, as this is the last time I will teach them.  Its interesting to compare this photo to the photo taken in 2009 also in the lab.

Then there is this photo in 2010, again I ballooned and never noticed I got that big.  You can barely see my eyes! Compare to one taken last week in a dress my sister bought for me to celebrate weight loss.

And because I can't help but show my cuties, here is Oakley going for his first rollerskate on Sunday.  He was all about just let me go Mum I wanna do it by myself.

Friday, 12 October 2012


Thought I'd better throw some words here.  I'm super busy as semester draws to an end, I have one more week of teaching and then we're in to exams, so as of next Friday life slows down yay.  I have graduation for our students on Wednesday and I'm quite excited about it because this year I'm not going to be ducking the cameras :)  The following Wednesday I have to chair a conference and that is pretty much the last thing in my diary for things I have to be places I have to be.  Such an awesome feeling to know that its almost summer, almost holidays woohoo.

Weight wise I'm in maintenance, I've done enough.  A year and a half and I just do not have the drive anymore, and I'm ok with it.  I'll post a pic of moi soon, but until then here is my fav quote at the moment, had to make it in to a pic to inspire.

Hope everyone is good, I'll do the rounds in a week or so.

Mucho love
jitters aka wiggly aka brydget

Sunday, 9 September 2012

My name is Jitterfish, and I'm a sweet-a-holic

Its so obvious really, but to be honest I've only just realised I truly am an addict when it comes to sugary treats. I cannot have just one, and if I know they are there I cannot control myself.  I always joked about being an addict, but its with a big ol "duh" and a little bit of liberation that I realised that I am an addict.

Now just how to deal with it.  For one not having it in the house. I now know that even when I get to goal this is going to have to be the norm, if I have the junk I'll eat the junk.  Lucky for me I'm not to fussed for crisps, I've very much a sweet tooth. It means the kids have to have very boring cookies that I don't really like, not a bad thing I guess. This will get more challenging as they get older though!

Guess I'm lucky I don't like alcohol as well, bright side right?

Friday, 7 September 2012

A mixed victory

Fridays are my hardest day of the week, its the day I'm always off plan and eat crap.  Today was no different.  It started with a cookie eaten quickly with guilt, and of course not actually enjoyed so why why why did I do it?  Then I felt good about myself when at music I only had a cup of tea and didn't partake in the choccie bikkies on offer.  Lunch was good and then the danger zone, Friday afternoon.  I eyed up the kids cookies and told myself no, and then my eyes spied chocolate buttons.  There was a moment of "aw shit" LOL. My sister had come over on Wed and made cakes with the kids and I thought she had used all the chocolate up or taken it home.  I lasted about two hours before a crinkle could be heard from the pantry as I opened the packet and ate some buttons, then some peanut butter.  Because nom nom choccie and pb!

Then as I contemplated "should I eat them all at once to get rid of them" (y'all know that idea, eat it so its not in the house!) it occurred to me that if I didn't want them in the house to avoid temptation then it was so frickin simple, get rid of them.  I poured them in to the sink, ran the hot water and watched (with almost tears) the chocolate melt away.

So I feel a little proud and a little disappointed.  I wish I had the will power to have chocolate in the house, chocolate buttons are great mini-treats for the kids.  But I just have no control.

Tuesday, 4 September 2012

Found the map again, we're back on track

I've decided to keep up the weight loss :)  I thought about it and figured yanno my hormones have been messed up for 4+ years now, what is another couple of months? In all honesty I think I was just looking for an excuse to stop, and an excuse to eat cake and crap!

As you ladies know it can be such a tiresome commitment. Sometimes weight loss becomes all consuming, and last week it was like that.  Partly I think because I had my period which is a horrid time for me, and all I wanted to do was feel sorry for myself and eat as much crap as I could get my hands on. I hate those days when it seems like you can't stop thinking about food, eating a meal and all ready you're thinking about when you can next eat and what you're gonna have and are there any cookies in the house.

I'm trying to decide if I'm going to go to the gym soon or not.  I had planned on getting in a cardio session today even though I've already been swimming this morning.  But I'm going out to dinner tonight FOR THE FIRST TIME IN 3.5YEARS WITHOUT KIDS.  Yeh, first time in that long, amazing right?! My sister is baby-sitting and Neil and I are going out for Turkish.  Then next weekend we're going out again because its out 16yr anniversary and Debbie (who looks after my kids during the day) is going to look after them for us.  So exciting.  Err... I digressed... yeh so to gym or not?  My muscles are kind of tired from swimming (current pool so its harder than normal swimming) but I'm pretty sure I'll eat more than I should tonight so I'm thinking trade off.

Plus, if I stay home I have to keep marking -LOL-  I've only got about 15 essays to go, amazing really I've churned through them this break, I'm actually going to be done before semester starts back on Monday which means I will have a week before my next big lot of marking arrives which makes a nice change.  My students have on the whole written really well this time around, my overall average is higher than it should be if I care about the curve but I don't - I believe that a student should get the grade they earn.

So time to go tie on my trainers then.  After a quick round of blog catching up that is.

Friday, 31 August 2012

A journey pause?

I might be stopping trying to lose any more weight.  My Dr has suggested I stop trying and let my body just maintain for the next six months or so due to period and messed up hormone issues.  I'm not sure how I feel about this.  On the one hand I want to listen to Dr advice.  On the other its just a possibility that the weight loss has messed with my hormones and that giving my body a good break will help it reset.  Part of me wants to take advice purely because I'm actually really sick of trying to lose weight.  But I'm soooo close.  If I could stay on plan I could slog it out and be at goal in two months.  What's another two months right?


I was on some hormone pills to try and sort things (really irregular and painful periods) and that didn't help.  And when I lost 10cm around my booty and some around my arms that is an oestrogen storage site so it is all linked.

Its so easy to use this as an excuse and just say ok I'm done.  But what if I can't maintain and I gain?  Honestly I'm scared I'm going to gain all my weight back because while I've made some life style changes I still have no will power around sweets etc.  If there is chocolate in the house it is in my mouth!  So if I haven't made permanent sticking changes what will happen?

Monday, 27 August 2012

A loss

I lost 1.5kg (3.3lb) of fat these past three weeks.  I almost said "only", but then remembered this pic.  1lb of fat, ewwww-ick.

I realised that I had been eating too much rice, I was suppose to be having 80g COOKED as a serve, but I was doing 80g RAW.  ooooops.  It equated to around 2-3x the amount, and given that I was eating that twice a day um yeah.  oopppps -LOL-

Jake was ok about the loss, but we had expected 2.1kg so there was a slight look of disappointed parent about him.  I will have that as the loss for the next weigh in.  In fact I'm hoping for more, I'm aiming for 3kg to make up for the not quite hitting goal last time.

Within 10kg to goal, man I've been so close for so long. If feels like forever. But I'll get there.  And super exciting Neil and I celebrate our 16 year anniversary in three weeks and at that time I'll weigh the same as what I weighed when I met him.  Booyah!

Back to essays.  Argghhhh.  The next six weeks are going to be a nightmare of grading.  And I will not use food as a comforter/mindless eating/distraction.  I've made a schedule to ensure I get exercise in and I even have house cleaning on there are distraction LOL.

Monday, 20 August 2012

Procrastination station

I should be reading essays but I can't face another one.  The topic is fun, resurrecting the woolly mammoth, could we do it and if we did what would the impact be.  But I just read a dreadful one so I need a break.  I am resisting the urge to snack, dammit I hate this time of year!  I have six week ahead of me of marking.  Essays will take me about three weeks and then right about the time I finish then the next round comes in (reports this time), plus I have my weekly marking that never ends.

I had a stressful day, that combined with the marking really makes me want chocolate.  I'm fighting every day at the moment to stay on plan, sometimes I win, sometimes I don't.  I see Jake on Friday and I'm a little nervous.  I'm not weighing myself so I don't know if I've lost, I fear the reprisal if I haven't -LOL-

Ok, back to the next one...

Tuesday, 14 August 2012

All the small things

This morning I ran in to an old friend, I've not seen her in around 5 or 6 years or about my peak fat period.  She didn't recognise me!  She was so blown away she couldn't stop saying how good I looked, what an inspiration etc etc.  Yep, pretty damn stoked with that reaction!

My weight doesn't seem to have dropped, I'm trying not to obsess on that.  Pretty sure TOM is about to show (I'm not exactly regular alas), and I've been mostly good.  There have been a couple of cookies though that made it past my will power barrier.  But I did stand up to chocolate cake and candy on Monday which made me feel pretty awesome.

I have to go buy new underwear, size small.  Say whaaaaat!  Yep, I bought medium just a couple weeks ago, bought a few pairs, and now they are slowly slipping down, yanno that feeling!  Not too bad if I'm wearing pants, but I wear a lot of skirts for work so really not comfy.  And when exercising really bad.

Arms are tired today from working my guns on the rower.  Inspired by watching Olympic re-runs.

Sunday, 5 August 2012

Because Mrs Munch asked for it

The first is me around my heaviest (~130kg), Christmas 2006.  The second is me last week, around 80kg.  The dress is actually a little too big now, I have more of a waist (wtf I have a waist!!).

Wednesday, 1 August 2012

Whoop whoop!

Saw Jake today and I'm a happy Jitterfish today.  In the month I lost 5.4kg of fat (12lb) and put on 1.4kg of muscle (3lb).  So I'm now in the healthy fat range, I'm normal yay.  In addition to weight measurements Jake tells body measurements, body circumferences and key fat storage areas.  Most impressively I lost 10cm (4 inches) around my butt, and my hip fat halved (23mm down to 11mm). 

After my totally off plan weekend (which I told him about) I am so happy.  And he was happy, he said I had exceeded his expectations which made me feel pretty awesome.  But there is danger, in my head I keep thinking "well I did this well even though I ate badly, so I can eat badly and get away with it..."  Ah, sneaky devil get off my shoulder.  I've got two social engagements this weekend, one an adults party with alcohol and the other a kids party with lots of kids party food.  So I will need restraint.  I'm not a drinker, I drink a couple times a year but I said I was going to drink to celebrate a friend returning to the USA. 

And so that's me.

Saturday, 28 July 2012

So far off plan I'm pretty sure I'm on another continent!

Today was one of those days.  We had what we call our craft day, I get together with some friends and we make crafts and eat too much and drink.  Today I didn't drink, but I certainly ate too much.  Because one of the crafts I always do is try out a new recipe, something that I've been wanting to try but know I can't have in the house or I will eat it all.  I made cookies n' cream slice (because I also make a cookies n' cream fudge and I wanted to trial a slice to see if I can use it as a base and make a nom nom desert).  Which I didn't eat too much of, but C made fresh bread from scratch and I am a sucker for fresh bread.  Plus we had BK for lunch, I've not eaten it in probably six months and suddenly I really wanted it so instead of opting for something healthy yep I had a double cheese burger.

But crafty wise I did good, I will post pics when its all finished but its in multi stages.  I'm making a sign for Oakley's bedroom, and putting together a gift hamper for my oldest friend. The hamper is going to be a birthday survival kit :)  I never use to in to craft, but our craft days are awesome.  And I have become a pinner I admit, I frickin' love pinterest!

So while I'm not beating myself up over it too much, I am a little gah about it because I see Jake (nutritionist) on Wednesday and I wanted to be able to say I had stayed on plan and been really good.  I was suppose to see him yesterday but he had eye surgery so had to cancel.  Ah well, life is life right?  And its not like it will do major damage, I'm not going to suddenly put on 10kg or something!

Thursday, 19 July 2012

When brain and body don't match

I'm at the stage in this journey where I have come so very far, I have just a little way to go, but I don't feel like I am any near the end.  To be honest, ignoring the obvious being able to exercise I don't feel any different.  In my mind I'm still wigglyjigglyfatty. 

This was very evident the past two days when I tried on some clothes.  I had gone to a thrift store in search of junk to re-purpose (we have a girls craft day where we get together and craft it up and drink), and saw two tops I really liked.  One was a large and one was medium.  I grabbed them and tried them on and they were both too big.  The large was gaping especially around the bust and arms.  The medium was so unflattering the way it hung off me.  I shrugged it off thinking they must have been stretched out, I mean how can I not be a large? 

Today while buying some new gym socks I saw a top on special, I thought I'd grab the medium thinking oh a possible goal top.  It was too big.  I stared in the mirror, and turned around many times, trying to see what was wrong.  I decided to try the small and it fit.  I should feel ecstatic right?  Nope.  I felt.... afraid and awkward.  Suddenly I couldn't tell if the top looked ok, I mean it fit and I couldn't see the muffin top or rolls.  But I couldn't buy it because... it was a SMALL and that - just - isn't - right.

Tuesday, 10 July 2012

Down with non-food

I haven't been to the gym in FOREVER (almost a week in reality). Its like an itch that you can't scratch, a niggly feeling of you've forgotten something. I just want to go to the gym. But the problem is I'm a morning exerciser, in the evenings I just can't do it, its half hearted. I was thinking last night after the kids went to bed that I should go to the gym, that something is better than nothing right? Well its cold and dark, and the gym is all the way on the other side of town, I'd have to move Neil's car... a million reasons. Then this morning I wake up and feel like I could run to the gym. Damn body clocks.

I won't be going to the gym until Monday when I go back to work. Yep that's right break is almost over. Then six weeks of teaching, 2 weeks off, six weeks of teaching and OMFG the year is over. When I think like that it feels like the year is almost over. But I need to reign the brain in, because by Sep 15 I want to be sitting happily at 75-72kg. It is so close, 7-10kg to go in about 8 weeks. I know its do-able, but I'm not sure if I will get there. The closer to the ceiling the harder it is for sure. But by Xmas, hells yeah I'm gonna wear a pretty dress this year.

Eating on plan. My typical day is:
  • 35g of special k and a protein shake
  • yoghurt and apple
  • chicken salad sammie
  • 2 mandarins and 15 almonds
  • sweet potato, chicken and salad

I'm currently looking for recipes to make my own protein bars, I don't want to buy them all the time but I know once I'm a work (so eating gets harder due to time constraints) that protein bars are the best afternoon snack option for me. But they are filled with non-food. Non-food is any ingredient that has more than 3 syllables or a number in it (only applies to english words). When its science speak, its not food -LOL- So broc-co-li is acceptable, po-ly-dex-trose is not ;) I'm sure there are exceptions, feel free to tell me.

Sunday, 8 July 2012

Just some ramblings

Not really sure what this post is about. I just wanted to write. The eating plan is going good, always great when I can stay I'm staying on plan. At least on plan food wise, exercise wise I won't be getting to the gym for a week :( I've got the kids home for the week, but if the weather is fine I'll try and go for a walk with them in the push chair. But its winter, so really chances of fine weather isn't great. Man, I've been eating so much raw broccoli lately so I've got lots of stinky farts going on. TMI I know, but in our house farts are celebrated. Oakley in particular thinks they are hilarious, nothing cuter than a 1.5yr old farting and giggling, and the giggles making him fart more!

Tuesday, 3 July 2012

Some pics

So I found an old photo, taken at what would have been my heaviest (~290lb) and I was amazed.  As was my husband, he said he couldn't remember me ever being this big. Now unfortunately our camera is broken so we haven't taken any pics recently but this one here is my most recent and also the fat jeans pic.

Never again folks, never again.

Monday, 2 July 2012

Still alive!

How many times have I said that I'm going to be more active blogging?  I really thought I'd be around more this break, but I started writing up a paper for publication and it means I get to the stage where I can't stand the idea of more computer use even for pleasure.  But don't worry Gertie, I'm still here :)

So my last post I talked about giving up the no-carb diet and seeing a nutritionist.  Jake is my guy and he is awesome.  He showed me that my original goal of 75kg was more realistic than 66kg.  Sorry for ya'll I can't be bothered converting to pounds today.

He did a body fat analysis and worked out my percentage, which was in the low 30s (I can't remember what now).  A healthy fat percentage for the average females is 25-31%, I need to lose just a couple kg of fat to be in that range.  If I tried to get down to 66kg I'd be in the athletes range (14-20%).  Funny though because every weight chart 75-72kg (the range we're aiming for) puts me as fat, but that is because I hadn't factored in excess skin weight.  Yep, the flabby skin that we all dread is going to be my unfortunate badge of reminder of how fat I use to be.  I'm never going to look good in bathing suit, but thats ok :)

So at the moment we're working on building muscle to get my metabolism higher so my calorie intake can be higher and I can get through this damn yo yo bust phase.  Hopefully by the end of July I will have lost 5kg of fat but put on 2kg of muscle and I'll be in the healthy fat range.

When I go back to work its going to be difficult, he wants me eating morning and afternoon snacks which really do not work in with my schedule.  I'll be eating breakfast at the normal time of 7, and then a snack at 9, lunch at 1, snack at 5:30 and then dinner at 6:30.  Seems silly having that late snack but he is the expert and that's why I'm seeing him!

Tuesday, 5 June 2012

And now that's over...

So I'm no longer low carb.  Three weeks I made it and then a weekend of carbs.  I've decided to still reduce my carbs but dammit I like being able to eat a sandwich for lunch!

I've decided to make an appointment with a fitness nutritionist.  He gets you to bring in what you eat (three weeks of tracking usually) and then he designs a meal plan around what you normally eat but at a relevant calorie/nutrition level for you to lose weight (or whatever your goal).  He sounds a bit of a brutal task master but I think that's what I need. 

I've revised my goal, I was to get to 66kg now.  It was 75.  So now it means ~15kg to go instead of ~5.  But guess what, if I got to 66 that would mean I have lost 66kg!  I'd be half the person I was.

Hope you're all doing good, last week of teaching for me so I'll actually have some blogging time and be able to make the rounds.  Five weeks of no teaching (but grading, writing stuff for next semester etc) means five weeks of not having to be at uni at certain times, I can go to the gym three days a week without issue!  Because I will have the kids the two other working days.

Friday, 25 May 2012

Shiratake chicken stir-fry

So I just tried shiratake noodles for the first time NOT in sukiyaki.  Thought I better write down what I did because the stir-fry was yuuuum.


Shiratake noodles
Chicken stock
Peanut butter
Peanut oil

1.  Wash shiratake noodles really well
2.  Par-boil shiratake in a pot with half a garlic clove, half a chicken stock cube, some water and a dash of kikoman
3.  Remove from heat and drain and leave to dry
4.  In a bowl marinate chopped chicken breast with some kikoman, garlic, the other half of the chicken stock (dissolved in a just enough water to make a paste).  Marinate for however long (at least 30min)
5.  Dash of peanut oil in a wok, add onion and noodles and fry until onion is soft
6.  Remove from pan and set aside
7.  Add chicken to the pan (with marinade), about half a tablespoon of peanut butter and fry
8.  Add vegetables (except spinach) and after about 2min add noodle/onion mix
9.  Add spinach just enough to wilt
10. Season and serve

If you're not familiar with shiratake noodles they are a Japanese noodle that is low cal, low carb, low fat.  Depending on the variety they are around 20 calories, 3g carb (1 net carb because 2g fibre), 0.5g of fat per serve.  They smell like fish at first, you need to wash them really well (they come in a fluid filled bag) and most people par-boil them before using.   Apparently they work well as a pasta substitute in cheese based dishes too, so I'll give that a go at some stage.

I'd eaten these when I was in Japan, and konnyaku (which is the vegetable that it comes from) blocks and thought it was disgusting.  Then again I didn't like miso soup when I was over there either and now I love it.

Neil is thinking of trying low carb as well, he is eating low carb dinners with me but not sure if he has the dedication/motivation.  I hope he sticks with it, will make life easier!

Sunday, 20 May 2012

No longer obese!

Well folks, here we are at the end of my two weeks of low carb and the scales are showing a great response.  Now I know that for the most part the major loss at first is water, but the psychological lift has been amazing.  As of this morning I weigh 79.5kg (175.3lb), when I started I was back over 85kg so its been over 10lb lost in the first two weeks.  I lost most of it in the first week, this week its been about 2lb.  And my BMI is 29.4, yehaw. 

I am ok with the low carb, I'm going to continue for a little longer because its helping with the sugar cravings definitely.  So another two weeks and then we'll see.

Man, I can't believe I'm in the 70s.  This is high school weight folks!

Thursday, 17 May 2012

Thought of the day

Exercise is you king, and nutrition is your queen.  Together they create your fitness kingdom.

That is all.

Wednesday, 16 May 2012

NYT: Mathmatical challenge to obesity

The interesting parts:

That the conventional wisdom of 3,500 calories less is what it takes to lose a pound of weight is wrong. The body changes as you lose. Interestingly, we also found that the fatter you get, the easier it is to gain weight. An extra 10 calories a day puts more weight onto an obese person than on a thinner one.

Also, there’s a time constant that’s an important factor in weight loss. That’s because if you reduce your caloric intake, after a while, your body reaches equilibrium. It actually takes about three years for a dieter to reach their new “steady state.” Our model predicts that if you eat 100 calories fewer a day, in three years you will, on average, lose 10 pounds — if you don’t cheat.

One of the things the numbers have shown us is that weight change, up or down, takes a very, very long time. All diets work. But the reaction time is really slow: on the order of a year.

People don’t wait long enough to see what they are going to stabilize at. So if you drop weight and return to your old eating habits, the time it takes to crawl back to your old weight is something like three years. To help people understand this better, we’ve posted an interactive version of our model at People can plug in their information and learn how much they’ll need to reduce their intake and increase their activity to lose. It will also give them a rough sense of how much time it will take to reach the goal.

Tuesday, 8 May 2012

Half a week of low carbs

I don't know how people do this for long (I mean years).  It hasn't been too hard but you really need to plan and eating out is a bitch.  While I'm enjoying eating some food that I haven't gone near for ages (like cream), I hate having to think about carbs, is there carbs in this and how much.  I'm sure it gets easy but honestly not sure if I'd stick with it.  What I really want is the psychological hit of seeing some weight drop even if its mostly going to be water weight!  I just need something to get me going again.

Dinner tonight was delicious though, chicken bacon cream garlic pepper parmesan cheese served over sautéed zucchini noodles.  And it is keeping me full which is good.

But I'm not super low carb, I'm not trying to go into ketosis.  I'm aiming for 21g (yay for my fitness pal making logging easy).  But when you do start looking at the sugars in things it really is amazing to see just how much there is.  Low fat mayo = high sugar!

I'm weighing on Friday, I wasn't going to weigh until Sunday but I really want to see how I'm doing just in case I gain -LOL-

Saturday, 5 May 2012

So long, farewell, I wish you well but its over...

I'm breaking up with carbs.  Yep, I have decided to commit myself to two weeks of low carb and see how it goes.  I have a lot of trepidation about this journey but yanno what I'm kinda excited too.  I finished the last of my cereal today, I enjoyed a kebab for dinner and though omg this could be my last one for a while, can I do this!?

But its worth a shot right?  Man it so goes against everything the idea of eating fat food.  I've spent the past week flip flopping back and forward, reading up, looking at recipes, thinking omg really how how how.  But the fact of the matter is I am a sugar junky and they past month I have had terrible carb cravings.  Cookies, bread, muffins, pasta, nom nom nom.  I just can't stop.  My weight is still sitting around 85, but I want it to drop dammit. 

So wish me luck, for anyone who is doing low carb any advice?  Recipes you want to share?

Monday, 30 April 2012

Marking come out the waazoo

Alrighty folks, just a wee note to say I'm still alive.  I've got so much damn marking to do its insane.  I've just finished grading essays, this week I have 200+ lab reports due plus tests.  So yep, not much time.

Marking makes me eat, I've been so off plan its terrible.  But weight is stable.  I went for a swim today at lunchtime.  We have an endless pool (current pool) at the gym which is a great work out but so boring.  I didn't realise how much I enjoyed swimming laps.  I thought I hated it, because I hate swimming in a 25m pool and prefer a 50m pool because I hate turning.  But when you swim and don't get anywhere its boring.  My new waterproof MP3 player hasn't arrived yet either so it was super boring.  Oh, plus the pool has two mirrors in it!  So you get to stare at yourself while you swim, man seeing my jiggly bits in the water, emphasised even more by the current pushing on your skin is not pretty.

What I do like about it though is I can go for a 30min swim, not have to spend time showering and changing.  Its just like jump out of the pool, quick dry off and change.  Couple min vs 15min.  So I am thinking I might take my togs (swimmers?  bathers?  what do ya'll call them) with me on Tuesdays too because I might just be able to get a swim in on some days when my morning class finishes early (I teach from 9-10, then 10-1 but this half of the semester my 10-1 class will often be only 2 hours yay).

Friday, 20 April 2012

Happy birthday to me!

Gosh its been almost a month since I last posted, as you can guess life is busy.

I turn 33 today, I'm super happy about it although from a weight perspective I expected to be at goal now, oh well.  Its funny, I'm not losing but obviously I'm losing weight, gaining muscle and the density of muscle yada yada we've all heard that before... because in the past week I've had many comments on how good I'm looking even though these are people that see me regularly so its not like from drastic weight change.  One day I did happen to wear a dress that obviously had a really good cut because it gave me some shape and that day everyone commented.  I will take a pic of it and post it.  I bought it for a funeral ( my great Aunt who was 89 so not really that sad) and then wore it to work one day when I had to look all impressive.

So lets see, anything knew?  Not really.  I am planning on doing a competition called the tough guy tough gal challenge - 6 or 12km run through mud, swamp, under barbed wire etc.  So I need to find some creative training -LOL-  I'm going to run in the current pool, figure that would be a good work out and good training. 

That's all I have time for, I have essays to mark and have been so busy at work training the biology olympics team (yes that is a thing LOL) that I'm totally behind on marking so I'm sitting here at 9pm on a Friday night on my birthday grading papers.  But I have 50 essays that I want to get through before Monday, and then I'll have another 50 to do next week once classes start back and hopefully have them all done (~210 essays all up) before my next lot of major marking comes in the following week (~170 lab reports) plus of course test marking which is a constant of my job too.  Argggh. 

Love to everyone, I hope to make the rounds soon.

Thursday, 29 March 2012

Oh yeh, hi muslces!

So I did my first ever pump class.  Oh man am I going to be sore in the morning!  I was shaking so hard from muscle fatigue, and now my biceps in particular are so weak and already starting to get a wee ache on.  I think I will do pump every week, I really enjoyed it.  Luckily my friend Chelsea has been lots so I asked her to come with me so I knew what to do in regards to getting all my bars and stuff.

I like classes because with everyone around you it pushes you just that little more.  And now that I'm not swimming (just no convenient time) I wanted something that wasn't just going to the gym and doing the same cardio/weight combo.

This last 10kg is way too stubborn.  Here is hoping that a little more muscle building will help.

Friday, 23 March 2012

New scales I have defeated you!

So I'm back under 85kg, 84.8kg.  So take that new scales that wanted to throw my game!  I'm daily weighing now, never use to be a fan but I'm finding it is helping me so much with keeping my focus.  I think because I'm within 10kg of goal the battle is just so much harder that I'm celebrating every 100g loss.  And its still two steps forward one step back, but hopefully I'll be under 80kg before my birthday and I'll be able to say I'm in my 70s, which is the range I was in when I was 18.  Ye-haw.

Life's good.  The family drama still sucks but we're dealing with it.  Hope ya'll are happy out there in net land.

Monday, 19 March 2012

New scales... damn it!

So my new scales arrived today, and now I'm back over the 85kg mark.  Damn it.  I know this is just recalibration, not that I actually gained a couple of kg last week (although I didn't have the best week, it sure wasn't that bad).  So now its just time to refocus and making those numbers go down again.

I haven't been to the gym in over a week.  Last week a combination of the family drama and Neil being in Australia for work meant I couldn't go.  This morning I packed my gym gear ready to go to the gym this evening after work (my gym is at my work), Neil was picking the kids up from care.  By 4pm I was like man I'm so tired maybe I'll skip.  But then I was like no, lets go!  So I grabbed my gym gear and then realised I had no socks.  Damn it! 

Tomorrow I have family commitment in the evening, I'm going to take my gym gear with me just in case it doesn't take as long as I'm expecting. I'm not really sure what is happening, other than I am there as peace keeper chaperone.  I imagine that its going to be late, but I figure if I'm prepared that might just work.

So that leaves Wednesday morning, all going to plan I can get my tuckus to the gym.  I wish I could work out every morning I hate evening work outs.  But hey, only three more weeks and then I'm on holiday for two weeks so I'll have a nice two weeks of Mon-Thu being able to work out when I want.

Tuesday, 13 March 2012

Um, yeh...

So I'm kind of experiencing some crap at the moment.  I can't say much due to anything I put out there to the big wide web can come back.  But in short a family member has got a drug problem and so I'm trying to deal with that, being the person she trusts the most I'm playing liason with the rest of the family and trying to just keep everything together. 

Thus everything else is kind of on the back burner, no gym this week as I have no time.  Neil is in Australia again and now that I'm back at work my hours are full.  I'm hoping to at least go for a walk on Friday with the kids.  Food wise I was doing ok until today, exhaustion has led to not having the energy to prepare food.  I was given a slice of double mousse pie by a friend so that and sushi was lunch.  On the way home all I wanted was chocolate so I stopped and got a kit-kat and dinner was cheese on toast because I just could not face cooking.

I've been asked to write an article for the university teaching magazine so I have to work on that tonight, but my plan is to go roast some veges and then work on the article while they cook.  Then tomorrow when I get home make a roast vege pasta.  And hopefully I can get an early night, I'm very lucky both kids sleep well (they are in bed at 7 and 7:30pm and don't get up until 6:30-7am).

Don't know what my weight is, my last weigh in I finally broke the 85kg mark and was 84.8kg :)  But then Neil broke my scales LOL  So now I've got new ones on the way.  Which of course means I will weigh something different, I wish I had been weighing at the gym as well but n'mind.  So I'll be somewhere in the 80s and I'll just start tracking again making sure those numbers drop.

Tuesday, 6 March 2012

The angel and the devil

Don't you love the debates your brain has.  "Do it", "don't do it".  The angel on my shoulder gets poked with the devil's fork quite often, and is often just poked right off my shoulder!  But today I'm happy to report that when the devil tried his sneaky move, my angel opened up some ninja kick ass and won :)

Today I got my schedule wrong, I dropped the kids off at 8:30 and had to meet students at 9:30.  I had planned on going to the gym, thinking I'd have a good hour to spare.  When I got to work I realised my error, there was no way I'd have the chance to work out, shower and be up in my office.  Well at least that is what devil told me.  He was opting for just going up to my office and using the shower up in our block and saying screw the gym.  But no, angel opened whoop ass can and I went to the gym and just did 25min of cardio realising something was better than nothing!

I'm also really happy that I've managed to stay on plan at work.  I was organised and made roast vege frittata which was yum and just meant in the morning I popped it in to my lunch box.  Because mornings in our house are nuts as I'm sure you can imagine with two lil ones plus DH and I trying to all get ready.

Sunday, 4 March 2012

Tired brain tired body

First day back at work, great day but man am I bushed.  My throat is a little sore, a combination of an annoying cold that I've had for about a month and talking for four hours straight.  Seriously, this cold is pissing me off, we've all go it, it just won't go away.  I sound like a smoker, its a hacking cough ready to spit out a lung,  But its very on and off, I'll be super blocked one day and then fine the next.

Alas Willow's cold seems to have gotten worse suddenly, she has an earache so it looks like the cold has really got in to her sinus.  She is asleep in my bed at the moment, its going to be one of those nights, not great when I'm already tired (I'm going to bed soon, and its only just gone 8:30!).  She woke four times last night, not from being sick but bad dreams and losing her pillow.  The joy of three year olds, they can't work out to reach over and pick their own pillow up LOL.  So I was tired waking up today but still went to the gym.  I feel awesome for doing it.

No gym tomorrow, my day is too full on.  But I'll go Wednesday as planned and then Thursday hopefully go to a step class.  And I was on plan for food so pretty happy, but I needed to be coz on the weekend I ate lots of crap and the scales showed it.  Not sure how much is water retention (TOM is due) and how much is actual gain.  But I don't care, I ate lots of yummy chocolate baked cheesecake and some mini berry muffins.  The muffins Willow and I baked last night, along with banana cake.  Luckily I don't really like banana cake and the mini muffins are all in the freezer so no temptation.

Night night all.

Saturday, 3 March 2012

Lazy Sunday afternoon

Last weekend I was 86.4kg and I set the goal to be under 86 by this Sunday.  Today I'm 85.7kg so 800g loss (1.8lb).  Next Sunday I am looking to be less that 85.5kg and ideally 85.0.  I know this is a modest goal but with returning to work first week back is always crazy so while I'm planning of working out and staying on plan I have to be flexible.  Especially as I am always exhausted after first week (four months of nothing its a shock to the system to be working again).  But if I reach 85kg, I will be 10kg from goal.  What a feeling.

Didi, to answer your question, I teach college biology.  I love it, I love science and while in grad school working as a TA I discovered I loved teaching too.  I'm super lucky that I get to teach the practical biology, most of my teaching is done in the lab.  The down side to this is you can't eat in the lab and when a class is busy I can't pop out for a bite.  And the classes are three hours long.  On a Tuesday I teach a theory class 9-10, then I'm straight in the lab 10-1, and then a break and lab 2-5.  But that break is often filled up with paper work so lunch is eaten at my desk or while seeing students.  What this means is that I often get to the end of Tuesday (and Thursday as well because I have a double lab day) and realise I've had one drink all day.  So this semester I'm going to make a much greater effort to get more fluids in.  Again it means having to leave the lab, but at least I can just half stand outside the door and drink from my water bottle.  I'm thinking of setting a timer on my phone to remind myself.

The most disgusting view

Earlier today I was doing ab work on the swiss ball, and Willow and Oakley decided that I made an excellent bridge (while doing chest presses, extra incentive to keep my body straight!).  After I had finished Willow wanted me to make more bridges so I decided to flip over and attempt some SB press ups.  At this stage I should say I was doing all of this only in my underwear as I had just got out of bed and was too lazy to put on work out clothes knowing I was only going to do ab work then shower.

While facing forward, rolling with the ball under my legs and supporting my body with my arms I looked under me (Willow wiggling away and Oakley chasing her) and saw the most hideous sight.  My stomach.  Hanging down like a monster.  Oh - em - ge.  Babies plus weight loss has given me such losoe skin (still with plenty of fat under there too), I knew I was going to have excess skin but seeing it was a shock.  I've only noticed a little bit of loose skin so far (mostly in my thighs), but in this one position ick. I know there is nothing I can do, my skin will either shrink a little or not.  And I'm not going under the knife.  So now I get to have saggy boobs and saggy body yay.  Just as well I had no intention of wearing a bikini...

Interestingly I learned that people on low carb diets are more prone to saggy skin.  I'm not low carb, just less cal.

Tuesday, 28 February 2012

Getting to the core of the problem

I have abs.  I have sore abs.  Yay sore abs!

Yesterday I had my session with Sarah and I told her that I wanted a new program with a real focus on my core.  I have never done core work, in fact I avoid it like the plague because I have no core strength and it embarrasses me how useless I am.  Talk about fat girl thinking though "I'll do it when I lose weight", "I can't do that everyone will look at me".  I decided fuck that noise, just doing it!

And so with Sarah's wonderful help I have a new program and I really enjoyed it.  Also I wasn't as useless as I thought so yay.  She made me do planks, she got me doing the easy plank (on your knees) and because I could easily hold that for 1min she was like nope you need the real thing.

What is even doubly awesome is most of it is dumb bell and swiss ball work so I can do it at home and hopefully encourage Neil to do it (he also has a very weak core).  So I'm hoping to have the motivation to do it on a Friday with the kids home.  Go for a work, then do core.  I'm pretty terrible at working out at home, I love the gym but for some reason at home its like eh nah. 

Saturday, 25 February 2012

One week at a time

Ok so after my rant about losing the will to shed the weight, I've had a good week.  I've stayed on plan all week and worked out three times, with a result of -3lb. 

So I think I need to break the focus down to the little bites.  One day, one week at at time, 1kg at a time.  Today I'm 86.4kg, by next Sunday I want to be under 86kg.  Little bites.

Tuesday I'm meeting with Sarah (fitness consultant) to revamp my gym workout.  I want to do more free weights and core work.  With my returning to work in a week I want a new plan for the start of semester to make the most of limited work out time.

Tuesday, 21 February 2012

Shopping spree

I go back to work on the 5th, I am so looking forward to it.  My brain needs the engagement and I'm hoping it will also help with the weight reduction because I will be more occupied during the day.  It could be the opposite though because its going to be harder to get workouts in and some days it becomes impossible to eat and so I end up ravenous and we all know what happens then - if its edible I'll eat it... mmm glue...

But I have a plan, I'm hoping to work out Monday, Wednesday and Thursday.  Mon and Thurs will be after work, Neil is just going to have to pick the kids up from care and do the evening routine without me.  I know chances are this will mean two minute noodles for dinner and no bath, but yanno I think I'm ok with that.  And if I'm super organised I can make their dinner the night before so he can give them other stuff.  Wednesday is my easy day, I don't start teaching until 2pm.  So I figure I can workout in the morning and just take the work I would normally do home with me (grading, ah joy).  The only flaw in the plan is that I actually hate working out in the evenings, I'm such a morning exerciser.  So we'll see.  I'm hoping to get around this by signing up for a yoga or pilates workshop that is on the Monday night (when the next one starts, not sure when that actually is).

And I'm going to buy fruit to take and leave in my office on a Monday so I can eat it.  I figure I can munch on a banana while walking to a class. I just have to make sure I eat all the fruit or take it home at the end of the week.  Tuesday and Thursday are the hard days because those are the days I have heavy teaching.  Tuesday I start at 9 and no break until 1.  Then 2-5.  And between 1 and 2 I usually have things I need to do but hopefully I can make it office things and eat while working.

So yes, back to work in just over a week.  Which means I need work clothes!  While I spend a good portion of my day wearing a labcoat I still have to wear clothes under it, and I'm too small for all my clothes.  So I spent the day shopping, and actually got to the stage where I couldn't stand shopping.  You know why?  There.Are.Too.Many.Options!!! 

I'm no longer limited to that little section for the plus size, I can buy off the rack in normal stores.  I was like a kid in a candy store, who soon got a sore stomach because there was too much.  But I ended up with a swag of clothes.

3 x skirts
2 x pants
2 x shirts
2 x shoes (ok so I didn't really need new shoes, but hey, um, I needed them!)
1 x gym shorts
2 x bras and panties
4 x stockings
3 x camisoles
2 x necklaces
1 x scarf
2 x jackets

Um, yep I think that's it.  I need to get a few more shirts, but I have a few already that I can wear for work so its not a major.

500 miles for 2012

So I just joined this challenge over at 3fc, oh man.  Its doable, but a huge goal.  That is 804km in a year, or 15.5km p/w, 67 p/month.  Jan I checked my log and I did 53.7, this month only 21.3 to date.  I've got a lot of miles to log!  Of course a lot of my work outs this month has been swimming hence the big drop.

I jumped on the spin bike today, I actually really enjoyed it, I was sweating after just 10min.  Definitely going to do it more as part of my work out, I'm over the elliptical it seems.

Damn I hate my stomach.  

Sunday, 19 February 2012

Its not just the wall, its the ceiling

So I am sick of trying to lose weight.  I'm not getting anywhere because I don't have the motivation any more of watching what I eat.  Exercise wise I'm doing great, I can run 25min, and pretty sure if I tried I could run 30.  Almost finished the c25k awesome!  But if anything the last three months has really emphasised that weight reduction is 90% diet, 10% exercise. 

On a Monday I weigh in and then I work out and for three days I usually do well.  Then I have four days where I don't work out (kids home, then weekend) and I don't watch what I eat and instead of listening to my body I eat more than I need to.  For example last night after dinner I wasn't hungry but Neil had a snack so I had one.  Its that mindless eating that is doing it.

And the truth is, after a year of thinking about it I'm just tired.  I wish I was happy with my accomplishment so I could just say yep I'm here lets just maintain.  But I'm not.  Will I ever be?  Who knows.  But right now I am stuck at 87kg.  I go down to 85 and then back up.  Bounce bounce bounce.  Its frustrating, what I really want to see is 84, I feel like breaking that barrier would be so amazing, but its still not enough to push myself, to make myself accountable for everything I eat.

So what now?  Probably no changes, I'll keep trudging.  I've hit the wall for motivation and as my beauty therapist said I've hit the ceiling as well because I've lost so much weight that to keep going I need to really increase my calorie deficit.  Some days I'm enthused, others (like today) dejected.  And so I trudge...

Saturday, 11 February 2012

Back from the rock, Niue that is...

We're back from vacation, and an amazing week it was.

Friday arrived in Niue around midday to intense heat (around 85, coming from low 70s made worse by moving from air conditioned plane to the heat of the tarmac). Got the rental car and drove to the resort. Matavai is the most upmarket place on the island, but by western standards it was like a really nice motel but not a wow resort. Although location omg to die for. And staff, brilliant.

Niue is a gorgeous and the people amazing. But some things never ceased to amaze me, like derelict houses everywhere and chickens just running around. There were even chickens in the airport. Its not third world, I guess its developing world. They have to import so much because the island is small (you can drive around the whole thing within 2hrs doing 35m/h speed limit) and is a coral atoll so very little grows food wise. But there is so much to do, it is so beautiful and we are intending on going back.

There is little crime on the island, only around 1400 people so its sort of a case of everyone knows everyone. The locals got to know us, we'd get greeted warmly when we returned somewhere (partly because we had little blonde kids so we stood out!). The people are so trusting there is a self service bar (you just get your own drink and put the money in the till) and one cafe we went to we arrived just as they were opening so the guy was like just help yourself to the bar I'm just getting the kitchen sorted.

View from our room at Matavai

One of the pools at Matavai

In the pool after a day in the ocean instead of having a shower we just jumped in the pool

While there cyclone Jasmine gave us a wee kiss (70km+ winds), it was exciting with a slight hint of danger. Seeing the locals boarding up and listening to the winds was incredible. In 2004 they had a cyclone that created a surge wave that managed to sweep 200m inland, which is amazing considering the wave had to get over a 35 feet cliff first. Still even with Jasmine we got a chance to see waves crashing so high up the cliffs the power was scary. Pics don't do it justice, nor does the video. I'm being blown around so much you can see from how the camera jiggles.

Matapa Chasm, this use to be the reserved spot for the chiefs to swim. Alas the day we went the weather was drizzly (tail end of cyclone Jasmine)

Lizards everywhere. Each morning we'd open our room and there would usually be around 4 lizards hanging out on the roof enjoying bugs. A short walk down to the restaurant for breakfast we'd easily see 20 of these lil guys (size from 1-3inches).

Togulu Sea track (Tamakautoga village), an amazing spot especially for the kids. The fish came within 5cm of the shore, the water was so clear I just couldn't get over it. This pic is taken looking through the water (there are actually two fish there) while standing on the beach, it just looks like a photo of the beach.

One of the reef pools at Togulu. We got to see lots of different species of fish, sea snakes (very venomous, yet pretty impotent as they can't really bite you unless you try and shove your fingers down their throat, more a deterrent from anything eating them), sea cucumbers and crabs.

More Togulu pics

While driving the road at night you have to watch out for these guys, big crabs crossing the roads

When on a tropical island, one must drink cocktails!

The island is a coral atoll, all cliffs and coral, lots of caves (some of these are from Avaiki cave)

We didn't get a chance to go to some of the really popular places due to having the kids (steep slippery walks, deep pools etc) so our plan is to go back during the whale season (Humpbacks pass through from June-October, and you can see them in the bay at the resort) without the kids :) And silly me I didn't take the camera with us a couple of days so don't have pics from some other spots.

Saturday, 28 January 2012

Whooshes and squishy fat

Interesting article on water retention theory on weight stalls and whooshes in weight loss.

TOM has shown up, I'm super happy about this.  Not from a weight loss point of view, I weighed 85.8kg, so close to reaching the 10kg to go mark.  But with TOM my weight will bounce back up, ah well.

But... we're off to Niue in one week so I really didn't want to have my period while over there.  So yay, as my period only lasts about 4 days it'll be over and done before we go.

Put on my goal jeans today out of curiosity, they fit.  I'm muffining over the top but as long as I don't wear a tight tops they look good, and they are comfy.  I go back to work in 5 weeks so I will need to buy new clothes soon, I have nothing work clothes wise that fits.  I could get away with jeans, but I need to buy some tops.  I so wanted to be at goal before I got back to work so I could buy all new clothes at the size I'm going to be, but this isn't going to happen.  So I'll just have to buy a few things to be as versatile as possible - at least I wear a labcoat a lot of the time so its not too bad haha.  I also need new shoes, my feet have gone down about half a size.  And bras.  Hey, I don't need socks, yay!  LOL

Wednesday, 25 January 2012

In the zone

So after months of flagging motivation and excuses I am back on track.  I'm counting and logging my calories and I'm coming in under budget every day.  I'm at the point where if I consider having a treat food my brain then thinks nah, I don't want to waste the calories on that.  I even turned down both carrot cake (my fav) and double chocolate brownies today, instead I had a couple strawberries and didn't even feel tempted or deprived.

I so hope this keeps up, but with going away on holiday I suspect it will be a week off plan.  But I don't think it will be too bad.  Plus you've got to have fun on holiday, I mean its a tropical island, you can be sure I'm going to be having a few cocktails!

We've been doing walks with the kids in the back pack.  Walking with an extra ~14kg on my back is a work out, sore in my shoulders though.  To think I use to walk all the time with how much extra weight!

11.1kg to go to goal.  Yay.

Tuesday, 24 January 2012

Raw Vegan Alfredo Sauce with Zucchini Noodles

4 small zucchinis 
1 cup raw cashews, soaked in water for 20 minutes and drained 
3/4 cup water 
1 tbsp lemon juice 
1/4 tsp nutmeg 
1 tsp thyme 
2 garlic cloves 
salt & pepper, to taste 
1 tbsp light miso paste (optional – look for unpasteurized miso to make this 100% raw) 
2 tbsp nutritional yeast (optional, if you want non-vegan sub this for cheese, I used mozzarella/parmesan combo) 

To make the zucchini noodles: Using a vegetable peeler, starting from one end of the zucchini, peel a long ribbon of flesh down to the other end of the zucchini. Turn the zucchini and repeat this step around the entire zucchini, until the core is so small that it is difficult to peel. Repeat this step for the other zucchinis. 

To make the raw Alfredo sauce: combine the remaining ingredients in a food processor and blend until smooth. 

Place half of the zucchini noodles in a serving bowl and gently stir half the sauce through it. Repeat for the remaining noodles and sauce. Serve with a sprinkle of fresh basil or parsley. 

Serves 2 

Made this for dinner tonight, yum. Am going to use zucchini noodles again tomorrow night with a pesto.

One year weight reduction anniversary

One year and one day ago my Mum had a heart attack.  She is obese, has type II diabetes, so a heart attack was no surprise to any of us.  One year ago I visited her in hospital, talked about her impending angioplasty and possible coronary by-pass, came home and ate two chocolate bars (kit-kat cookies and cream, and caramel chunky).  Then I cried.  And that was the moment I made the decision to change my life.

Today I am -100.1lb from my heaviest weight of more than 290lbs (291 and then my scales gave me an error because I exceeded maximum, so who knows what I actually was).  I call it a journey, getting rid of the weight.  Because its never following a straight path, there are always detours and delays.  I've bounced around a whole lot for the past couple of months.  I think I'm back on track though, I have the desire again, I'm focused and I know I can lose more weight.

One thing I’ve learned is weight reduction (I avoid the word loss because when you lose something it usually implies you want to find it again and I sure don’t want my weight back) is 80% diet, 20% food.  But it is 100% mental, you need will power and determination.  As you can see math isn’t my strong point ;).  I've also learned that I actually don't like cake (except carrot cake).  Alas the same thing cannot be said for cookies -LOL-

And now I get to continue on this trip, my realistic goal is 165lb which is what I weighed in high school.  When I get there I will reassess.  Part of me would love to get lower, part of me just wants to go in to maintenance now!

TL;DR: 291+lb down to 190.9, one year, still going.

Sunday, 22 January 2012

The Impact of Weight Stigma on Caloric Consumption

Obesity 19, 1957-1962 (October 2011)  [ABSTRACT]

Natasha A. Schvey, Rebecca M. Puhl and Kelly D. Brownell
The present study assessed the influence of exposure to weight stigma on energy intake in both overweight and normal-weight adult women. Seventy-three women (mean age: 31.71 ± 12.72 years), both overweight (n = 34) and normal weight (n = 39), were randomly assigned to view one of two videos depicting either weight stigmatizing material or neutral material, after which they consumed snacks ad libitum. Pre- and post-video measures included blood pressure, attitudes toward overweight individuals, and positive and negative affect. Participants' body weight was measured, as was the number of kilocalories consumed following video exposure. Overweight women who watched the stigmatizing video ate more than three times as many kilocalories as overweight women who watched the neutral video (302.82 vs. 89.00 kcal), and significantly more calories than the normal-weight individuals who watched either the stigmatizing or the neutral video. A two-by-two analysis of covariance revealed that even after adjusting for relevant covariates, there was a significant interaction between video type and weight status in that when overweight, individuals consumed significantly more calories if they were in the stigmatizing condition vs. the neutral condition (F(1,65) = 4.37, P = 0.04, η2 = 0.03). These findings suggest that among overweight women, exposure to weight stigmatizing material may lead to increased caloric consumption. This directly challenges the notion that pressure to lose weight in the form of weight stigma will have a positive, motivating effect on overweight individuals.

TL;DR: Fat people viewing weight stigmatising videos then ate more calories than normal weight people.

Tuesday, 17 January 2012

Happy new year

Here we are, 2012.  I intended on writing more, earlier, but yanno how life is.

Weight reduction, well I maintained over the holiday period.  I'm finding it really hard to get my head back in the game.  Exercise wise I'm all good, its food.  And food is the way to reduce weight.  To be honest I don't know if I'm going to succeed in further weight reduction, I want to, but the drive isn't there.  I just want to eat rubbish.  I keep thinking "think through the eat".  But it doesn't work, I still have this little voice saying ahh fuck it, just eat it.

On the plus side I went through my drawers and wardrobe today and threw out everything that was 20+ or had an X on the label.  I had doubt, I had moments of should I really get rid of this.  But then I said to myself I don't want to go back.