Sunday, 19 February 2012

Its not just the wall, its the ceiling

So I am sick of trying to lose weight.  I'm not getting anywhere because I don't have the motivation any more of watching what I eat.  Exercise wise I'm doing great, I can run 25min, and pretty sure if I tried I could run 30.  Almost finished the c25k awesome!  But if anything the last three months has really emphasised that weight reduction is 90% diet, 10% exercise. 

On a Monday I weigh in and then I work out and for three days I usually do well.  Then I have four days where I don't work out (kids home, then weekend) and I don't watch what I eat and instead of listening to my body I eat more than I need to.  For example last night after dinner I wasn't hungry but Neil had a snack so I had one.  Its that mindless eating that is doing it.

And the truth is, after a year of thinking about it I'm just tired.  I wish I was happy with my accomplishment so I could just say yep I'm here lets just maintain.  But I'm not.  Will I ever be?  Who knows.  But right now I am stuck at 87kg.  I go down to 85 and then back up.  Bounce bounce bounce.  Its frustrating, what I really want to see is 84, I feel like breaking that barrier would be so amazing, but its still not enough to push myself, to make myself accountable for everything I eat.

So what now?  Probably no changes, I'll keep trudging.  I've hit the wall for motivation and as my beauty therapist said I've hit the ceiling as well because I've lost so much weight that to keep going I need to really increase my calorie deficit.  Some days I'm enthused, others (like today) dejected.  And so I trudge...


  1. I've had similiar frustrating times like what you're experiencing. But I know with certainty we will get through this hump and get the motivation train going! :) You've come so far!

    Don't give up woman.

  2. Maybe you need a refocus. So you are not trudging. Nix the concentration on what motivates you or your lack of motivation and just say to yourself "This week I am bound and determined to lose a half kg. What is it going to take? So it is more "I am determined to get somewhere below my current weight - to break the spell and I can do anything for a week" Plus determination is more doable over the long haul right. Sometimes you do not always feel motivated to do what is hard or annoying, but you probably can muster determination. You do not accomplish what you have by being a slacker. Am I right?

    1. I think you kind of hit the nail in that I need to think week to week. I keep looking at the big picture and for once I need to focus on the little. Instead of thinking how I want to get under 85, I'm thinking I want to lose and keep off 1kg.

      So far its working this week, the weekend will be the teller though (especially as I'm catching up with friends who I've not seen in awhile, so always we eat too much)

  3. Hey, you have come a really really ridiculously long way. Lifelong journeys piss us the hell off sometimes.
    Put a rubber band on your wrist, and snap the stupid thing (hard) whenever you are tempted to fall into the habit of mindless eating. Yeah, it's silly, but at least it will get you to completely focus on what you are about to do for a minute.
    What makes you give in to the mindless eating habit? Perhaps you can fool your brain into making a switch from mindless eating to mindless work-outing. ;)

    1. Pretty sure it is mostly boredom and not wanting to waste food. The latter is hard when you have kids, you tend to eat what they don't because you don't want to waste. I'm making myself just throw it out now, screw the starving kids in Ethiopia that my parents always would remind me of when I didn't finish my plate.

    2. I completely understand not wanting to waste food. I have a very tough time with that. Thank god I have a dog!!
      I keep the "small" leftovers in a tupperware bowl, and then give them to her in the morning. If it isn't enough for one person to eat the next day it goes to the pup. Unfortunately she can't eat certain things, but I've gotten better at tossing the scraps. I dump them outside sometimes so that the raccoons will eat them.
      Is there some spot away from the house that you could toss them? I am a crazy person, and knowing that some kind of creature is finishing my food scraps puts my mind at ease.